Welcome to Jordan's China Blog!

Cold weather sure did sneak up fast... and so did the flu... I started getting all stuffed up and got a really annoying cough. So I had to do it... I decided that I would go to a Chinese doctor. John and I decided that we would go together on Friday which was the next day. Friday rolls around and boy was that an interesting day. So I'm teaching my last class in the morning, I turn my back to the class while writing on the board, turn around... and there are two boys beating the crap out of each other in the back of the class! I run back there yelling Hey! Hey! and pull them apart. I tried to ask them what happened but neither could translate the situation into English.. I could tell that they were both really ashamed of what they did, both of their heads hung low as I took them to their head teacher. As I was walking back to my class I was in awe.. like... what just happened? Jeez...

My Classroom

Me- "Why you lookin at me like that?"
John- "You put it in your mouth..."
Me- "Yeah it's a thermometer..."
John- "In China we don't do that, we put it under the arm"
Me- "Oh.. well should I switch?"
John- "You don't have to, that is the correct way"

Then it dawned on me.... Oh my god.... I have a nasty chinese armpitty thermometer in my mouth..

Me- "John..... do you think they wash these?"
John- "Hmmmm...... I don't know"

I sit there with a blank look on my face thinking about how many Chinese armpits this has been on... The doctor comes up, looks at the thermometer and puts it back into the same drawer she got it out of.. wow.... no wonder why I'm sick..
Thats not the worst part, after talking to the doctor John says that I have the option of getting a shot or taking medication... I'm thinking.. a shot? what? why? But then he explains that it will work a little faster so I agree. I go back into a little curtain room and tell John to come with me. The nurse comes and I take of my jacket and start to unbutton my shirt. John gives me a confused look and says... "Jordan, in China.. we do shots here" and points to his butt. I say.. You've got to be kidding me... so..... I pull the ol trousers down and the nurse pricks the needle in, of course I flinch and let a little yelp while laughing... so John starts laughing, then the nurse starts laughing... John says "Wow... this would make a funny picture!" and I say "I should have brought my camera" so John pulls out his phone and snaps one of the greatest pictures of me with my pants down, getting an unforgettable shot in the booty. As we're leaving the nurse says something to John he turns to me and says.. "If you feel better tomorrow, you will come back for another shot ok?" Hmmmmm..... I guess they didn't want to leave the other cheek hangin.....

Halloween was really fun and well........ interesting. We met some new people from Russia, Hungary, and Italy so I invited them over for some Halloween festivities along with some other friends. Of course I had to decorate my apartment... you'd be surprised what a little toilet paper and some red bags over the lights can do! It was a success! After the party here we went to a club Mazzo. To our surprise, Mazzo was decorated in Halloween stuff too! Well I don't really know HOW it happened, but at some point in the night I found a little rubber squishy mouse and was carrying it around in my hands petting it. It's just kinda funny when you wake up the next morning with a rubber mouse in your pocket... It's one of those things that makes you go.. hmmmm.....

My apartment for Halloween

So its been some time since my last entry, not going to lie. Well we had a very nice break from October 1st to the 8th, so 8 of us teachers decided to take a journey to beautiful Hangzjou and Shanghai. That is about a 19 hour train ride from Shijiazhuang, first taking a pit stop in Hangzjou. Actually the train ride wasn't so bad, we bought tickets for "hard sleepers" where you get a bed, in a cabin with 5 others... sleeping really does help the ride go along. We got into Hangzjou and had about 4 hours to kill before our train left for Shanghai. So we took some cabs to West Lake, a huge, absolutely beautiful lake. It was a gorgeous day so we all plopped down our luggage and sat on the lake wall just off the walkway. Little did we realize that there was a congestion of Chinese people starting to accumulate behind us and taking picture after picture of us. It got so bad that a security guard actually came up and hurried people along! After the guard left, someone came up to one of us and wanted their picture taken with us about every 5 minutes. (I take it they do not see many foreigners in this part or we all look goofier than the foreigners they typically see). But after the photo shoot we were on our way to Shanghai.

People starting to take pictures of us at the lake

We got into Shanghai at night, which made finding our hostel a little tricky. We were staying a few subway stops from downtown and our street was filled with little shops and fruit stands. Shanghai is particularly interesting because of the former French Concession and has a western kind of feel to it. Western food is something that everyone was kind of looking forward to. We could not have had better weather while we were there, oh man... sunny with a temp around 75 so Saturday we took 2 hour boat tour down the river, right along the edge of massive buildings and city parks. I must say it was very peaceful, it was nice to get away from car horns and constant loud sounds. Saturday night we heard about a club called Zeal that was running a special for foreigners, so a bunch of us from the hostel all met up there. Zeal was awesome because it was so easy to meet new people! Everyone was from a different country, each having their own reason for being in China, which is really interesting to hear. Sunday night we went to a crazy acrobat show! It felt like I was in a high school auditorium, so I was kind of skeptical at first but I was soon proven wrong. I have never seen stunts like this before in my life. They were jumping through spinning hoops, balancing ridiculous things all over their bodies and a lady was flinging cards out of her hands left and right. God knows where she was keeping all of them.... The rest of our time in Shanghai consisted of walking around and stuffing our faces with western food and coffee.

Boat tour in Shanghai

Unfortunately we could only spend 3 days in Shanghai, we had to catch a train back a day early due to the scheduling, so it was off to Hangzjou again. We got into the city pretty early, had a nice long walk along the lake again. (Not so many pictures this time) then had a glorious western dinner and some drinks. The next day we had a long 17 hour trip back to Shijiazhuang. On the way back, we were entertained by a cute little girl who's english name was Nancy. She was hilarious and so goofy you'll have to look at the posted pictures to truly understand. She was eating something 90% of the time, including a long hot dog type of thing... which she was kind enough to shake in my face plenty of times. Oh, and I don't want to forget that she didn't eat the whole thing... dropped it on the floor, only so I could step on it and have it get stuck to the bottom of my shoe. From that point I decided that I would write a book called "Nancy and her Mischievous Wiener".

Teaching has been going great. We talked about seasons last week, where I had the students name different things that they would wear in each season and I would draw a picture of it on the board. Then I divide them into two teams, call one from each team up and I say "Find me....... Boots! or Coat! and they have to find the item on the board. This is absolutely hilarious... especially when neither student has any clue where the item is so they frantically slap every item on the board!

Oh I took a short trip to Beijing two weeks ago, Steph and Laura came with me too! The train ride there was pretty interesting. I sat next to a lady and her family who thought I looked like the soccer star David Beckham, so after a few pictures and questions about America we got into Beijing. There is a band named Owl City and they are coming to Beijing so we had to go buy the tickets at the venue that they will be playing with. It was a very successful trip I have to say. I went there for the tickets, a big travelers backpack and whey protein, and we ended up finding all three the first day we were there! So the next day we went to Olympic Park where all the Olympics facilities are. To our disappointment we couldn't even go in any of the buildings!!!!!! They were under "construction" which of course started 2 days before we got there.... yeah... I know... but it was still really cool to see.

The Bird's Nest Olympic Park

So this week I decided that it would be cool to teach the students a bit about Halloween and attempt to play a game... I'll let you know how that goes... Wish me luck!

So we were in a restaurant last week, just another typical dinner with Laura and Sam. As if we don't get stared at enough, Laura bumps into the light switch and shuts off every single light in the entire restaurant... After about 3 seconds, she quickly tuns them back on realizing what she's done.. The whole place is dead quiet staring at us, and Laura (from London) says in her little British voice... "Oops, sorray...." Sam and Laura quickly left the place and I followed holding my stomach dying of laughter. It is really cool now though, because the places we go remember us and usually know what we like or provide a little extra accommodation. My buddy Jason did the Drake-China program last year and is staying again this year. He is an awesome resource and is fluent in Chinese. He got Liz and I connected to a Chinese guy named Jack, who owns 2 private foreign language schools and was looking for 2 foreign teachers! Jack is a great guy, fluent in english, and pretty well known in our part of town. So now I have 7 additional hours a week of teaching, which is perfect. The kids at this school are anywhere from 10 to 15 years old and I find out what I'm teaching about 5 minutes before class... This is like an after-school school... Kids come here to practice english to get more experience outside of class and they're parents usually work late so it's kind of like a daycare too. The kids here are crazy rambunctious, so they want us to play as many games with them as we can, while teaching them English. Sometimes a bit of a challenge, but always a blast! Jack pays us weekly in cash and the middle school pays of every month in cash... I feel like a drug lord with all this cash flow and that I have to store it someplace secretive... The private school is about a 7 min taxi ride if there are not any cars, people or bikes on the street, so you know that never happens, unless.... you have a bike! Then it takes about 15 minutes. So Liz and I got a second-hand mountain bike for about $13 American. Sweet..... Biking in China is one of the coolest feelings, weaving in and out of traffic, zooming past all the slow people... until one day it's dark outside and your on your way home and you turn your head to the right for a half a second to look at some fruit and almost totally collide with a Chinese dude coming straight for you... One of the scariest feelings, I have no clue how I didn't smash into him... Ha!

Well last night sure was interesting, so I have a Chinese friend that can speak 3 words of English and I met him randomly at an outdoor restaurant one night. We had been out that night and caught some late night food when he motioned for Laura, Liz and I to come over at sit to drink with him and his friends. So... whenever he is at that place now, he texts me to "Come up" and drink with him and his buddies. Though I can't understand everything he says, we do a pretty good job at communicating with each other. So I go meet them and drink a bit and they wanted to go to KTV. I was like sure I don't care, so we got in a car and went to the nicest KTV place I have been to yet... So we sit down, and the managers of the place file in 10 Chinese girls all dressed up in long red dresses and line them up in front us. I'm sitting like... "Ummm.... what the heck's going on?" My friend points to one of the girls and then points to me. I thought to myself..."Dude, if these girls start like stripping or something I'm out of here..." I shook my head No and try to say something, but this girl comes up and sits right next to me... My friends pick out a few more girls and after that the rest leave. At this point I'm trying to get my friends attention and have no clue what's about to happen. I quickly put 2 and 2 together and realized that the girls where like prostitutes.... Just then, the girl puts her hand on my leg... I slowly turn my head to give her an uncomfortable look and she says to me.. "Do you speak English?" I was so excited that someone finally spoke English and said Yes! and told her that I'm an American teacher at 42 Middle School blah blah blah and for the next hour, sat and talked to my prostitute about life and school!.... no joke... It was really cool actually! Hahaha! So a good conversation and an Avril Lavine song later we were all leaving. (Obviously without the girl!) I got home safe, had a fun night and now have a prostitute friend which hopefully I will never see again!

I have been meeting quite a few new people lately. Most of them pretty well known guys in the community. One of them is in charge of providing security resources, a couple others worked for schools and a few more foreign teachers. I really try to take and find any opportunities that get me into the culture and introduce me to new folks. When you sit down or spend time with most people here, it shows them that you are a foreign friend and that you'd like to be included! This usually ends up them buying you lunch or dinner or want to do any favor for you! Not a bad deal don't you think? (And mostly all of them are impressed that I can drink and eat so much! Haha!)

This past week, many of my students have been asking me if a have a Chinese name yet. I said no and that they should think of one. I asked Jack about it and he said that it should have a special meaning. Hmmmmm.....So I was sitting down for dinner with Jason, his girlfriend, a teacher from Wisconsin and 2 Chinese girls (Jason's friends), and I was STARVING. I had been running around all day and didn't really get any time to eat. So at dinner, not gonna lie... I ate quite a bit... including 3 bowls of rice... (The Chinese word for rice is Mi Fan) Jason's girlfriend and her friends were laughing, amazed that I ate so much rice and they started calling me Mr. Mi Fan... well that quickly turned into the name Bi Mi Fan, which means "White Rice!!!" Bahaha! Why the heck not? It has special meaning! So now I am Bi Mi Fan or.... Jordan "White Rice" Ehlert... hear me roar...

Our fall break starts this week on Oct. 1st for one week of no class! Hooray! It is a national holiday celebrating the 60th anniversary of the People's Republic, so half of China will be traveling around! The plan was to take a trip to Hong Kong, but every single train was sold out! So now we are going to train down to Shanghai and stop at a few other cities on the way! It will be great to peace out and be free from the kids for a bit. I'm not too sure how I'm feeling about the 20 hour train ride down there though...

Well I've been here for a month... It's better late than never to start this! Many of you may have gotten my first email, but if not.. no worries! I first arrived in Beijing Aug. 15th with 4 of the other teachers, 2 days before the rest of the group arrived. This was really nice because we were all pretty jet-lagged and it gave us some time to rest up and explore! The are so many people... everywhere... all the time... it is ridiculous. Traffic is crazy enough and if you think you can get past that, there is are separate lanes for cars and bikes! And they WILL run over you! We met up with the others 2 days later and bussed down to Shijiazhuang, (the city I will be teaching in) for a week of training and a homestay. We all had about 4 Chinese lessons, but holy smokes... mandarin is one tough language! The 4 different tones make learning it, how should I say... interesting.. Lets see, the craziest things I've eaten so far is duck tongue, intestines and donkey (by accident) at least now I truly know what ASS tastes like... My homestay was totally awesome though. I stayed with a nice girl named Vera and trust me... I met her whole family and then some... Vera, will be going to University in the fall for to study english and she speaks very well. I stayed with Vera for 2 nights and I don't think I've ever eaten that much in my life. It is tradition to make sure your guest is full at meal time, so her Nana kept putting food on my plate and telling me to Eat! Eat! in chinese. haha! I learned a lot from staying with Vera, I look forward to visiting her again. The last night of training, we all had a big dinner with some of the individuals from the different schools we would be teaching at. That is the night I got introduced to Bi Jo and KTV... Bi Jo is a crazy rice liquor that is very cheap and will get you drunk as a skunk and KTV is karaoke and let me tell you, when you put those 2 together, you have yourself a fun night! The KTV places are usually very nice and you have at least 3 people that serve you all night! (Picture walking into a really fancy movie theater and all the employees are in tuxedos..) The best memories of that night was when Kirk our director started rapping in Chinese then after that everyone sang the ABC's song because they had it on the list! The next day, Sam, Liz and I were all taken to No. 42 Middle School (High School) and to our apartments which are right across the street from the school. They are very nice and are very close to a gym, grocery store, a giant park, street markets and about 1,836,639 restaurants to choose from.

The Inside of our School!

So classes started last week and Oh man... what a feeling to get up in front of 70 students at a time and introduce yourself... Everything you do they look at you in aw... Everyone smiles when you look at them and usually whisper something in Chinese to the person next to them. The school is divided into 2 sections: Juniors and Seniors. Our building reminds me of a monkey house in a zoo... you can hear hoots and hollers coming from it as your walking up to it, so you kind of get nervous at first... It smells like pee anywhere near the bathroom or they say "W.C." Sam and I have our own classrooms which is really nice and we have the exact same schedules. So... I've gotten.. "Mr. Jordan is that your girlfriend??" and "Mr. Jordan is that your sister?" or "Mr. Jordan who is that girl you walk with all the time?" It's pretty funny... My students wanted to know 2 things... 1. What is my phone number and 2. If I can speak Chinese. I only answered the first question of course. I also got my first present this week, one of my students came up to me after class, held out his hand and said "Mr. Jordan, a present." I looked down and it was a plastic cockroach.... I started laughing and said "Well then... thank you. What is his name?" and the boy said "Allen" So now I have a new friend named Allen, who I will tape to the chalkboard, just in case some girls are talking in class, I'll be able to walk by and plop ol' Allen on their desk.

Taxis are pretty cheap especially if you buddy up with other people and we are finally starting to figure out the bus system. This makes visiting friends for dinner on the other side of the city pretty easy. Last weekend 2 of our friends came down from a near by city and I had everyone over to my place. We had a dress up rule and you had to wear something completely silly. Let me tell you... I wish I could have taken a before and after picture of my apartment. Let's just say the cake fight got my living room a little messy. It was a good time overall and our friends had a great time. (We even taught our Chinese Assistant John how to play beer pong and quarters) Well that's about it for now... Don't forget you can holler at me on skype! My screen name is somethinginsummer